1 of 31


Handwarming on Baba’s belly at the Christmas tree farm, Santa Cruz Mountains, CA.
Photo credit: The Mrs.

How does one resume posting after an unannounced, three-week absence from one’s own blog? Which itself followed a (barely anticipated) months-long, slow-to-a-trickle output? Which itself followed a notable diminishment in spirit, if not quantity of output which had been ongoing for at least half a year, occasioned by events destined to remain offstage?

One sidles in with an apology (please forgive me), followed by a month of photos. Of which this will be the first.

I’ve had some false starts at returning in earnest here (thought this one a month back was the return for good; turns out, not so much).

A few times in previous years I’ve punted and gone all visual for a month, usually when times were tough in one way or another. There was work to do; words were hard to come by; sometimes both. This time around it’s more the latter than the former, though the “work to do” reached a fever pitch back there, putting me and my blog output over the edge.

We ain’t goin’ anywhere this year, my wee brood and I, what with it being our first winter holiday in our actual home, the one we’ve waited so long for and worked so hard to make. I believe it will be a gift to me to post a picture here every day. Let’s see if it can happen, eh?

Words to accompany, from time to time.

Happy first night of Hanukkah, for those celebrating the Festival of Lights.

[And a nod of thanks to Lisa and Torrie for helping drag my fingers back to the keyboard. Thanks for reminding me we’re all in this thing together.]

5 thoughts on “1 of 31”

  1. You’re awesome! Just enjoy what you have worked so hard to get – life can be incredible, joyous and tedious – hope you can enjoy each moment. Looking forward to all 31 pics…..

    • Thank you SO MUCH! You are so right: joyous, tedious. Elating, fatiguing. Wonderful and blessed beyond dreaming and also, so, so sad. Tragically so, sometimes utterly unnecessarily so. But there it is. Over and over again I just keep thinking: wow. Such a thing, life. Glad to be sharing it with you.

      Welcome to the few, the proud, the drought-tolerant LD commentariat! I look forward to posting ’em all, lemme tell you.

  2. I just registered to leave a reply and now I notice that the other person that commented on this post is “….marie.” *giggles* I had no intention to copy, I swear. 🙂

    Anyway, I wanted you to tell The Mrs. that this photo is so heart-warming and well composed. Basically, great shot!

    Thank you for coming back to the blog with renewed vigor, because I’ve been following your blog for well over a year now (maybe two?). Please know that I find it gives me hope and inspiration. Happy Holidays!

    • Oh, thank you thank you ninamarie, and welcome! We got a special this week on Maries.

      It makes a palpable difference to know that (and when) anyone gets something positive from whatever it is that winds up here. I have fairly lengthy conversations in my head about the worth of it all, and fairly regularly (especially when I let in the Mephistophelean voices) I question the value of one family’s off-and-on story, as told by one member thereof. I’d hurl if I thought that it revolved around something narcissistic, and I spend forever identifying the through-line of anecdote that keeps my kids’ vulnerabilities essentially protected. What gets me to overcome the naysaying Mephistopholeses (Mephistopholi?) in my head is the conviction that I am telling many more people’s story than our own — not because my storytelling is that prodigious, but because we are ordinary, in the best sense of that word; our trials and tribulations are shared all over the place, with people seemingly like us and seemingly unlike us. That’s what I try to find and share here, and the not-aloneness that you-all chatty readers reflect back is something I find hope and inspiration from, too. To do right by you brings out the best in me, too, which is a huge reason why, after five and a half years pro bono and a strain on family finances, anyone is still at this kind of project.

      By the same token, outside of LGBT family events or Pride, I still almost NEVER see mannish women strolling around being parents. And we live in The People’s Republic of Berkeley, CA fer Chrissakes. In Barbara Lee’s and Nancy Pelosi’s district, the heathen Barbary Coast dreamland of blue-blue urban NorCal! Our school, probably one of the best in the school district for this, has no more LGBT-headed families than I can count on one hand. Including us. So the extraordinary elements of our quotidian lives — the two lesbian women intentionally heading it, the one of them not-mom and genderqueer part of our family — is food I need. I search it out and sop it up wherever I can get it (thank you, internet!). And so very much appreciate your companionship on the journey.

      I’ll pass along the photo thanks to The Mrs. She was delighted to snatch the camera (thanks as ever, AZ! great lens!) and record my butchy prowess cutting down the tree. I reserved the plumber’s butt pictures for the private family album. 😉

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