Lesbian Dad

Solidarity forever


Every time I look at our daughter and some new hi-jink that she’ got herself up to, I run through a quick series of thoughts, which go something like: (1) O my god that was impossibly adorable &/or amazing. Then (2) I have to share this with somebody (i.e. tell somebody; photograph this; what have you) so that they, too, can sip from this cup of manna that keeps runnething over every day; this 27lb., 15 oz. font of Reason for Living. Then I go (3) Wait! She just does that to me (and her Mama). O what a cliché I am. And finally I wind up at (4) Yet human beings around the planet are going through this over and over and over again over the younger human beings in their care. We’re all united by a sense of marvel at–you name it. Whatever it is that the kid(s) did or said that day.

Someone once made the observation that the blogosphere has the tendency to clump extremely like-minded people around one another. Not necessarily in a myopic, echo-chamber kind of way. Though that may also be true. People find and read material that speaks to (and hopefully enriches) their own worldview and experience. But this also enables us to find out that we are not (ever) so alone as we may think we are. We find that there are a ton of us lesbo parents (current and -to be) out and about, interested not just in how the world around us affects our families, but also how our families can affect the world around us.

I’ve dipped my toes into the lesbo parent blogosphere in earnest over the past, say, half a year, and have been a (lesbo) parent for almost two years now (I’m the first to admit it: I’m still a novice in both spheres). During this time I’ve gathered a lot, but mostly that this parent business is a very personal, hyper-immediate, 24 hour-a-day, worldview-altering thing. None of us lesbo parents do it who haven’t worked our arses off to get it to happen, one way or another. And clearly we love the bejesus out of all the children in our care, whoever they are and may become.

That’s a lot of will, mixed with a lot of love, to which most of us will remain fiercely committed for the rest of our lives. On our own behalves and on behalf of our kids, we’re all going to be up to some really good stuff. Whether we plan to or not. And we’re always going to have kindred spirits along the path, virtual and actual. And even when our political persuasions or intentions differ widely, we’re united in the desire to help our kids become as whole and filled with love and confidence as can be. I like that.

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