Fig. A. In which Baba elbows her way into the state’s somewhat limited parental imagination. (Alternative? How ’bout “Parent/guardian 1” and “Parent/guardian 2”? Has a nice Thing 1 and Thing 2 ring to it. Plus it works for EVERYONE. That’s what I, an honest taxpayer, like to see in my state-generated paperwork.)
Fig. B. In which we have to cop to the sad, sad truth about the potty training campaign.
Fortunately we also had the opportunity to wax on about our kiddle’s personality: “Radiant! Shimmering! She’s ready for her MacArthur genius grant, Mr. DeMille! Nary a fly in her ointment– er. Well. We’d go on about her few flaws but we ran out of space on the line!”
It aaaaalmost made up for the double indignity.